just scroll for a little whilescroll to be entertainedscroll to smilescroll to get excitedscroll to be inspiredscroll to feel sadscroll to loose focus and hopescroll to be frightenedscroll to interrupt my thoughtsscroll to forget time scroll to blur everythingscroll to make me numbfor the pain
as im scrolling through old facebook postschecking the lives of old friendsnoticing my completely chaotic varying aesthetics and interestsaltering all over the place throughout my life so fari feel like im looking into an alternative realityone could say: "you tried so many interesting things" buti feel like i dont belong anywhere at alli feel like wafting around in the vast nothingnesslike i took a wrong turn after anotheri feel...so lost and itit hurts...oh so much
"your hands in my pocket, they warm me like summer sunand i remember being unlucky, from my first day till nowyou never talked to me, only when we drove outside this townand im so fed up with being held, dont try to hold me now"human tetris - things i dont need
where are youi already missyour hairyour scentthe feeling of finallynot having to worry anymoreyou gave me innner peaceyou gave me hopelast nightin my dreamsare you out theresomewhere
as we break it downenergy is running our bodynourished by food and waterlikely our souls are toosustained by the samethis energy is passedthrough plants and animalsbefore being absorbed by usa chain of transferring energythat streches farour soulswhere do they gowhen we diethey wont just vanishinto nothingnessthe first law of thermodynamics declaresenergy cannot be creatednor destroyedso the world we knowis everything we arewe wereand ever will bewhen we passour energy will slowly dissipateinto spacebut never fully fadei ponderwhere do we journey tohow does it feelwhat does the universe taste like
do you sometimes think about what you've said back thenand feel sorry for it too?
the feeling when autumn is in its first throesits getting coldmornings are darkand you feel the urge to hide in blanketswith a cup of teait feels so nostalgic and purememories of your childhoodyoure playing outside in the coldyou can feel how youre walking through a sea ofgolden yellows browns and redsthe rustling of fallen leavesthen you notice the tears in your eyesyoure back into here and nowthese memories keep coming and going in wavesuntil they eventually fadeforever
never have i evernoticed the ugly smell of the cityand their streetsthat makes everything feellike a dream im either waking up fromor falling into the arms ofwhat else did i miss noticing?what is even true?what is real?
sitting in a crowded placeeveryone is in a rushliving in their own universeim in minealoneso many galaxies swirling aroundkinda chaoticand stillthey barely collidenor even take notice of each others existencealmost like looking up into the night skyfrom earthit seems so full and brightyet it is mostly darkand empty
do you rememberthe smell of window color?
"ich träum den traum der einsamkeitich träum den traum, bist du bereit?lass niemanden mehr in dein herzleb deinen traum, verbann den schmerz"welle:erdball - traum der einsamkeit
fall-ish heartlistening to a world dampened by the hourbreathing fresh shivery aira white curtain is blurring sightlush greens, the first rustling yellowsmoothlysoothingtime persistsa glimpse into eternity
i just want to floathead is fullmemoriesthoughtsideasracingit´s a messnowhere to holdinbetween all of themthe world is upside downwhen it´s going to end?i just want to floatin peaceagain
"bin ich stets gefangen wie ein kleiner engel flügellostief in einer welt dessen menschen mich rücksichtslosquälen mit wirklichkeit dessen inhalt mir so leer erscheintwie der tränenfluss eines träumers der dem tag nachweint-bin ich eingesperrt in dem kerker meiner phantasiewo nichts überlebt das von außen in mich dringen willdenn die wirklichkeit würd zerstören die harmoniedie mich sanft beschützt vor den menschen und vom altagsdrill-treib ich schweigsam fort wie ein losgelöstes blatt im windin die einsamkeit als der erdenwelt verlornes kinddiese wirklichkeit der gesellschaft ist mir viel zu fremdträum ich mich hinauf in die sphären wo mich keiner kennt-ist realität nur die folge der notwendigkeitwarheit zu erkennen die uns tief im geiste einverleibtdoch was ist schon wahr und so schön an dieser geistigkeitwenn dem träumenden sie als tränen in die augen steigt?"mantus - kleiner engel flügellos
late at night when im in bedthe sky clears upthe stars are gatheringeverything feels so minute
the feeling ofobserving our planetfrom spacecapturing the world as a wholeyou realise our floating rock isjust a grain in the universeand all off a suddeneverything we achievedseems so pointlesswhat is our role in this big picturewhat are we thenas an individal?
been tiredof thinkingof trying againtired of being exhausted
certaintyjust sitting around, like every dayafraid of thinking that way-there is no one i can seesomeone who can help me-though there is a lightoutside in the night-but how can i reachwhen i cant believe-what i want is certaintyotherwise i go astray-dont know what to doi dont wanna loose you-by the way of apologyi want to say-please dont leavecause youre all i need